Sunday, 22 April 2012

Nice Definitions


WONDERFULLY DESCRIBED DEFINITIONS...


              CIGARETTE:
              A pinch of tobacco
              rolled in a paper
              with a fire at one end
              and a fool at the other.


              MARRIAGE:
              It's an agreement
              wherein
              a man loses his bachelor degree
              and a woman gains her master.



              LECTURE:
              An art of transmitting Information                 
              from the notes of the lecturer
              to the notes of students
              without passing through the minds
              of either.



              CONFERENCE:
              The confusion of one man
              multiplied by the
              number present. 



              COMPROMISE:
              The art of dividing
              a cake in such a way that
              everybody believes
              he got the biggest piece.




              TEARS:
              The hydraulic force by which
              masculine will power is
              defeated by feminine water-power!



              CONFERENCE ROOM:
              A place where everybody talks,
              nobody listens
              and everybody disagrees later on.



                   ECSTASY:
                   A feeling when you feel
                   you are going to feel
                   a feeling 
                   you have never felt before.



              CLASSIC:
              A book
              which people praise,
              but never read.



              SMILE:
              A curve
              that can set
              a lot of things straight!



              OFFICE:   
              A place
              where you can relax 
              after your strenuous
              home life.



              YAWN:
              The only time
              when some married men
              ever get to open
              their mouth.



              EXPERIENCE:
              The name
              men give
              to their
              mistakes.



              DIPLOMAT:
              A person
              who tells you  
              to go to hell  
              in such a way
              that you 
              actually look forward
              to the trip.



              OPTIMIST:
              A person
              who while falling
              from EIFFEL TOWER
              says in midway
              "SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"



                     MISER:
                     A person
                     who lives POOR
                     so that
                     he can die RICH!



              FATHER: 
              A banker
              provided by
              nature. 



              BOSS: 
              Someone
              who is early
              when you are late
              and late
              when you are early.



              POLITICIAN:   
              One who  
              shakes your hand  
              before elections  
              and your Confidence
              later.



              DOCTOR:
              A person
              who kills
              your ills
              by pills
              and kills you
              by his bills!



No comments:

Post a Comment